Is Your Approval Seeking Behavior Turning Women Off? (Are You Giving Away Your Power to Women – Part 2 of 3)

approval seeking makes you the low man on the totem pole

Did you ever really like a woman?…  And so you tried to get her to like you back?

Maybe you took her out.  Dropped some dough on her for dinner.  Maybe, while out, you made sure you were a total gentleman.  Perhaps you did her favors.  Or you gave her lots of compliments.  Or acted overly-agreeable.  Or maybe you used bragging or showing off to try to win her over.

Maybe some combination of all this stuff?

This is pretty much standard practice for most guys.  It was for me at one time.

And the reason for doing this?

Simple:  So that she sees what a great guy you are, and then becomes interested in you.

But, let’s be honest with each other here…

How has this strategy worked out for you?

If you’re like most guys, not so well.  Most likely, rather than ending up in bed, you ended up frustrated.  Not feeling like you got out what you put in.  The return on your investment of time, energy or money only amounted to you ending up in the dreaded “friend zone.”  You may’ve succeeded in having her think you’re a great guy, yes.  But, most likely, that never turned into her wanting to be anything more than friends.

Well, what the hell happened here?  Why didn’t this work?  Isn’t this what our mom told us to do?  Isn’t this what works in movies?

Maybe you should try harder next time.  Try to be an ever greater guy.

Actually, I’m going to give you a VERY different way of looking at this whole situation.  Instead of this approval seeking, nice guy approach, that just doesn’t work, I’m offering…

A completely different way of getting women attracted to you.

In this post, I’m going to show you how to STOP trying to win a woman’s approval.  (Which, as you’ll find out, may be a life-long habit)

You’ll learn why being approval seeking just doesn’t work.  And in fact, it’s worse than that…  Continue reading “Is Your Approval Seeking Behavior Turning Women Off? (Are You Giving Away Your Power to Women – Part 2 of 3)”

Are You Giving Away Your Power to Women?

are you giving away your masculine power?

A man and a woman’s body fit together.  Like a lock and a key.  A hand and a glove.  A fat ugly lunch lady and a hairnet.   

They’re naturally designed this way.  It’s a perfect system.

Similarly, the male sperm and the female egg fit together perfectly.  Put them together and boom, life is miraculously created.  (Or boom, an appointment at Planned Parenthood is created.  Either way, it’s perfect and it just plain works.)

Well, women’s feminine nature and man’s masculine nature also work in very much the same way.  They fit together perfectly, and it just works.  Here’s what I mean by that…

We men are hardwired by mother nature to behave in a dominant and masculine way.  It’s a major part of who we are.

And women, are hardwired, by mother nature to become drawn to, and sexually attracted to a man’s masculine and dominant qualities.

Perfect right?  The two compliment each other.  I mean, what can go wrong?… Continue reading “Are You Giving Away Your Power to Women?”

When to Start Dating After a Breakup (or Divorce): The 5 Signs You’re Truly Ready

One of the most common questions I get from my coaching clients looks something like this:

“how do I know when to start dating after a breakup?  It’s been a few months and I want to make sure I’m ready”

Or:

“There’s this girl at my job who’s really cute.  I’m thinking of asking her out, but is there a way to tell how soon to start dating after a breakup?”

Let me start off by saying that getting some time and distance between you and your breakup (or divorce) is definitely beneficial.  But, believe it or not, the number of weeks or months you let pass is really of secondary importance.

What’s of primary importance then?… Continue reading “When to Start Dating After a Breakup (or Divorce): The 5 Signs You’re Truly Ready”

The 3 Dangerous Dating Mistakes Most Divorced (or Dumped) Men Make… and What YOU MUST DO INSTEAD if You Want to Get Back Out There and Meet Someone New

3 Dangerous Dating After Divorce Mistakes

 When the smoke clears, and the dust settles from your divorce or breakup…

Once you start feeling motivated again to do things…

And when you’re finally capable of seeing a hand-holding couple walk down the street without spontaneously forming a nostril-flared, mouth-foaming snarl across your face – as if some rich old broad came strolling by wearing a fur coat made out of puppy skin –  once you get to that point, my friend, then the next logical step is to want to “get back out there again.”

To see what the other ‘fish in the sea’ swim like.  (I was going to say ‘taste like’ but that would’ve been inappropriate.)

To enter back into the vast and beautiful dating world.

This is a good place to be… Unfortunately though…

Continue reading “The 3 Dangerous Dating Mistakes Most Divorced (or Dumped) Men Make… and What YOU MUST DO INSTEAD if You Want to Get Back Out There and Meet Someone New”

6 powerful ways to man up, and get your balls back after a divorce or breakup – part 2 of 2

get your balls back after a divorce or breakup part 2

(warning:  reading this post – and following the advice here – may cause your sack to suddenly expand in volume, to the point that beautiful women will start to stare at you below-the-belt, fawn over you, and follow you around like baby ducklings.) 😉

See if you can relate…

For a lot of men who’ve recently gone through a breakup or divorce, one of the most important parts of feeling like they’ve truly “bounced back” from the whole ordeal, is, well, getting their balls back.

What do I mean by getting your balls back?  Let me explain.

Both the time leading up to a divorce or breakup, and it’s aftermath, can entail some pretty emasculating experiences.  You can resort to some less than manly behaviors.   From your woman withholding sex, to her being cold and distant toward you.  And to you excessively explaining yourself to her like a child who came home with a bad report card, to you complaining about her afterward or taking on the role of a victim.  It’s safe to say that this period of your life hasn’t left you feeling like your most manly self.  But have no fear… Continue reading “6 powerful ways to man up, and get your balls back after a divorce or breakup – part 2 of 2”

6 Powerful Ways to Feel Like a Man Again, and Get Your Balls Back After a Breakup or Divorce (part 1 of 2)

Get your balls back after a breakup or divorce

Losing your woman hurts.

But for a man, when you lose your woman, the sadness you feel (or anger or frustration) for the end of the relationship is NOT all you’re dealing with.

In many ways, you can feel as though you’ve lost some of your manliness too.  Women don’t have to go through this.  But men do.

It can be weeks or months after the breakup or divorce, and you still don’t quite feel like yourself.  Your masculinity is somehow drained.  Your swagger is gone.  You tend to second guess yourself.  Your assertiveness is half of what it was.  It’s as if your balls have literally SHRUNK.

I’m going to show you how to reverse that.

Lets take a quick look at how we lose our balls in the first place.  (So we can prevent it from happening again in the future)

Then I will show you 6 powerful “Boost-Your-Balls behaviors” that will ramp back up your masculinity, have you feeling more powerful in your life again, and return you to the man you once were. Continue reading “6 Powerful Ways to Feel Like a Man Again, and Get Your Balls Back After a Breakup or Divorce (part 1 of 2)”

Regain your Confidence with Women After Your Breakup or Divorce: 4 Crucial Things You NEED to Know

regain your confidence with women after your breakup or divorce

After you’ve gone through a breakup or divorce you can feel as though your level of confidence has fallen off a building…

and then, when it crashed to the pavement, got backed over by a garbage truck… (Ouch!)

Instead of belief in yourself, there’s lots of second-guessing.

And yes, part of you wants to start getting back out there and meeting women again. You want to rebuild your love life. You want to prove to yourself that you can be happy in a relationship.  I applaud you for this and am in your corner.

The only problem is that when your confidence tank is close to the “E”, women can read that from a mile away.

Women are very intuitive creatures, and it’s as if they can feel you second-guessing yourself. They can feel when a guy has unconfident energy and – despite how great of a guy you are – this is ALWAYS a turn off to any woman. (Ouch, again!)

So today, I’d like to help.

What I’d like to discuss are 4 things you can start doing TODAY that will help you quickly regain your confidence with women, so that you CAN get back out there, enjoy a great dating life, and meet a great woman that we both know you deserve.

More specifically, these are 4 things that help regain your confidence with women by helping you… Continue reading “Regain your Confidence with Women After Your Breakup or Divorce: 4 Crucial Things You NEED to Know”

Revealed: The Unexpected Truth About Using the “No Contact Rule” After a Breakup or Divorce.. and How it Might Totally BACKFIRE on You

The no contact rule

Your woman broke up with you.  She no longer wants to be your lady.  Or maybe she flat out asked you for a divorce.  She basically said, directly or indirectly, “My life would be a lot better off without you in it.”

That’s a hard pill to swallow. 

Not like one of those little caplets with the smooth gel coating, but more like a big 24-sided Dungeons and Dragon dice-shaped pill that’s been dipped in broken glass.

That’s what it feels like going down anyway.

And when it’s HER who calls it quits, it’s ten times worse, isn’t it?

It’s not only a relationship coming to an end, which brings it’s own share of sadness.. but because it was HER who was the one to walk away, your male ego feels like it just took a prison beating.

And so it’s pretty normal after this goes down to… Continue reading “Revealed: The Unexpected Truth About Using the “No Contact Rule” After a Breakup or Divorce.. and How it Might Totally BACKFIRE on You”

Are You “Depressed” After Your Divorce (or Breakup)?… Here’s How to Tell, and What You NEED to Know to Climb Out of the Rut You’re In….

climb out of your post divorce or breakup depression

Depression is almost a dirty word, isn’t it?

Even though 1/3 of all Americans will experience bouts of major depression in their life, especially after times of loss or prolonged stress, (like say, umm, after a divorce or breakup for example) it still remains one of those things that’s completely misunderstood.

And because being depressed is so damn misunderstood, most guys who go through a breakup or divorce, and find themselves in a “rut” afterward, have no friggin idea how to get themselves out of it.  They suffer a lot longer than they have to.  They get into a “downward spiral” that affects nearly all parts of their life.  Here’s what I mean…

Their motivation to do the things they enjoy dwindles.  Their physical energy tanks.  Their mood is in the toilet.  Their ability to focus and make decisions is compromised.  And all of these things negatively feed into one another.

I suspect, if you’re reading this, then some of these “symptoms” sound familiar.

But here’s the Super-Important thing you need to know:

“Being in a state of depression for an extended period of time wreaks havoc on your brain function, submarines your libido, slows your metabolism down to a grinding halt, and beats down your overall health like it stole something…”

And so, if you’ve recently gone through a breakup or divorce, and you find yourself in a “rut” pay very close attention because… Continue reading “Are You “Depressed” After Your Divorce (or Breakup)?… Here’s How to Tell, and What You NEED to Know to Climb Out of the Rut You’re In….”